Can't Go Crazy If You're Already There

The Monday after ReVival 58, RIA entered her Las Vegas apartment. Immediately, her right hand shot into her purse, digging around while her left steadied the bag. She yanked an item out, holding it in both hands. The item? Her smartphone. Her right foot kicked the door closed, the force somewhere between lazy and excessive, preoccupied with the electronic in hand. A grin formed on RIA's lips, fingers pecking away at the device. Moments later, her gaze raised from the phone. A sigh of bliss escaped her lungs as she gently clutched the device to her chest.

The Psychoberry sauntered over to the couch in the living room, practically walking on air. She gleefully plopped down onto the furniture, placing her phone next to her as if it were a precious treasure. RIA leaned back, splaying her arms across the top of the couch, tilting her head rearward. That dreamy look of joy remained on her face. It wouldn't last.

“I want him.”

RIA whipped her head forward. That growling rasp. The uncompromising, forceful tone. Ria Nightshade was here, interrupting the Psychoberry's euphoria.

“What?” RIA asked, weariness and distrust in her tone. A specter only she could see appeared mere feet to her right. Nightshade's posture carried malice, danger, like a coiled cobra ready to strike at a moment’s notice.

“Kael. I want that motherfucker!” Nightshade’s voice made the situation clear; this was a demand, not a request.

“No.” The Psychoberry flatly responded. This demon had already managed a brief reprieve while RIA’s mental barriers were at their weakest. She couldn't allow it again.

“Don’t you take this from me! He’s insulted us! Belittled us! The piece of trash deserves to suffer!” The Toxic Queen shot back. “You know you want that. I sure as hell want that. Even fucking Lockhart probably wants that!”

The use of her name brought forth Ria Lockhart. Unlike her compatriot’s anger ladened aura, the Steel Hart stood relaxed, arms casually crossed on her chest.

“Hate to agree with Wednesday Stabbams–”

“Fuck you!” Nightshade snapped back, though Lockhart paid her no mind.

“–but he does have an ass whipping coming his way.”

RIA groaned, frustration evident as her head tilted back once more. She flung forward again, bent over and resting her elbows on her knees. Her line of sight scanned over to Lockhart.

“Look Lockhart, you gotta see where I’m comin’ from.” RIA began. “I finally, FINALLY have something good goin’ here! This stuff with Angel… Whether we’re callin’ it datin’, girlfriends, whatever, it matters to me! She’s making me happy! That bitch?” The Psychoberry thrusted an accusatory finger Nightshade’s way. “I don’t want her to ruin things.”

Nightshade sneered at the levied charge.

“Christ, shut the fuck up. I don’t give a shit about your little fling. I just want to spill Kael’s blood!” The Toxic Queen roughly assured RIA. The Rainbow Riot rolled her eyes, head lightly shaking left and right.

“Have you talked to Angel about our situation?” Lockhart asked. RIA ruffled the back of her hair, gaze shifting down.

“Not really…” She confirmed, voice faltering slightly. “I don’t wanna fuck this up.”

Lockhart hummed and nodded her head, arms unmoving. She paused before tilting her head and speaking.

“Do you believe she really likes you?”

RIA rose back up, eyes meeting Lockhart’s.

“I do.” The Psychoberry firmly stated. “She pretty much has said so herself.”

Another nod, but the alpha’s hands found their way to her hips.

“Then you have to be honest with her. Hiding this? Hiding us? It’s not gonna go anywhere good.” Lockhart gently lectured. “You saw Nightshade break free once. Do you want Angel to be unprepared if that happens?”

The question hung in the air, threatening to drop and crush RIA under the weight it's implication carried. She sighed mournfully.

“… No.”

“Then it’s gonna have to happen.” Lockhart reasoned. “The conversation might suck, but you gotta have it.”

RIA flopped back into the couch. Her lips pouted out, gloom weighing the pillowy orifice down.

“I hate that you’re right. Fiiiiiiine, I’ll talk to her.” The Psychoberry conceded. While that did solve one issue, a very pissed off, incredibly vulgar one remained. She stepped forward.

“What about me?” Nightshade barked. RIA looked over to Lockhart before glaring at the black clad woman.

“If I give ya this… Ya gonna go back in after?”

“Why the fuck should I?” Nightshade snorted. RIA bolted up off the furniture, drawing inches away from the Toxic Queen.

“Because if ya don’t, I’m not lettin’ ya out!” The Psychoberry defiantly responded.

“And I’ll make doubly sure that’s the case.” Lockhart added, staying in place while watching the interaction.

“That’s how it’s going to be? Fine then. I’ll play by your rules… For now.” Nightshade relented. RIA stared her alter ego down for a moment longer before retreating back to the couch. Her gaze went always, eyebrows furrowing.

“I guess the real question is… What and how do I tell Angel?”

The morning sun had risen, though you wouldn't be able to tell from the mostly dark bedroom belonging to RIA. But the sun, it's stubborn. Like a prisoner looking to escape their trappings, it found the most miniscule crack through the blackout curtains, managing to radiate a sliver of light across the face of the Psychoberry. The uninvited ray did just enough to disturb RIA's sleep, her eyes fluttering open slowly. Despite the unwanted invasion, the vision in front of her brought a small smile to her face.

Laying mere inches next to her was the slumbering Angel Quinley. The days the two had spent together since declaring their feelings openly had very much been in the vein of a honeymoon phase; compliments coated in honey, burning desire to be near each other at every moment, amorous moments of physical intimacy… While RIA was quite happy in her relationship with Sid Phillips, this was something wholly new. Something drastically different. Angel provided her with a natural high that she couldn't tear herself away from, nor did she wish to.

The Rainbow Riot reached a hand over delicately, the appendage running through Quinley’s hair, nails softly scraping across the woman's scalp. RIA didn't intend to rouse Angel, but her want to touch her partner needed to be satiated. She let her contact linger for a moment before cautiously rolling over to grab a nearby robe, constructed of silk and pink in color. The only thing that could tear her away from the bed, and subsequently, Angel’s side had reared its head. Nature called.

RIA slid out of bed as sensitively as she could, tugging the garment onto her near nude form. She moseyed over to the bathroom, carefully closing the door. RIA did her business before stepping up to the sink to wash her hands.

“When are you going to tell her?”

A huff jumped out of the Psychoberry's throat. Much like earlier, Ria Nightshade had made an unadvertised appearance, this time in the mirror.

“Soon. Chill the fuck out.” RIA mumbled, choosing to focus on her hand hygiene rather than the large mirror in front of her.

“Stop dicking around!” Nightshade snarled. “We had an agreement! You let me out, I bludgeon this abomination, then you can take back over!”

“Regardless of that whole situation, you're gonna have to have this talk at some point.” A materializing Lockhart added. “Might as well solve everything at once.”

“Can you let me make my fuckin' decisions please?!” RIA snapped before freezing. The outburst was loud. Potentially too loud. She shut her eyes and took in a calming breath before speaking again. “Just let me handle this on my timeline, please.”

The washroom was silent momentarily. Nightshade glared at RIA from her side of the mirror. Lockhart glanced back and forth between the two.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

The rapping at the bathroom door caused RIA to whip her head that direction, concentration on the self discussion broken.

“Bed got cold. Got hypothermia. We need to get back in there together or we're going to die.” Angel Quinley whined from the other side of the wooden gateway. Another deep breath from RIA, this one far more anxious. She opened the door. Angel stood there, hair a mess, the tank top she had thrown on barely concealing her goods, sleep shorts clinging tightly to her torso. No matter what anyone else might tell her, this vision was heavenly for RIA. She stepped forward, wrapping her arms loosely around Angel’s waist. She wanted to kiss her so badly… But her eyes gazed downward. Serious business first.

“I… I need to tell you something, Angel Face.” RIA solemnly stated, using the nickname she had picked out for Quinley.

“And under them fluffy sheets, I’m all ears.” Angel purred in response. She was making it so hard to stay focused…

“I have a condition.” The Psychoberry blurted out, fighting through the combination of infatuation and dread. “I have dissociative identity disorder… Pretty much, multiple personalities.”

There it was, out in the open. RIA’s line of vision stayed firmly downward. Each passing second of silence added more weight to her terrified psyche.

The playful tone of her amour shifted. Concern. "What do you mean by that? Like…for real for real? Not just like… donning warpaint and getting in a mental space? More like… this is a very real and diagnosed condition?” Angel inquired, her voice soft, yet, oddly, curious.

“Y-Yeah, it's real…” RIA said, her throat feeling like it was in the grip of Ivan Stanislav. “There's more than one person up in my head. Like, we're kinda three people sharing one body.”

Her arms folded across her chest. "How have you been with it? Managing it, I mean.” Quinley’s line of questioning continued. “Like, in the past? In the now?”

“Medication… Being careful with what situations I'm in… But it only helps so much.” The Psychoberry mumbled. Why did this have to be so hard? Why couldn't she just lie and say it was just a mindset, just exterior bullshit? She knew why. And she wasn't sure if the reason filled her with elation or abject fear.

“So…” A pregnant pause. An easing of posture. "How do your others feel about me?” That question did raise RIA's eyes up just a bit. Another exhale and she forced herself to meet Angel’s eyes.

“Nightshade… she's a nasty, antisocial, hate filled bitch. She doesn't like anyone.” RIA stated with plain honesty. “I'm told she got better for a period of time, but she's been like this for the most part. Lockhart… I feel like she'd take care of you, look out for you. But she's kinda got this detachment. Like, she cares but she's not gonna put her full self out there. It's hard to really say. Even though we share a brain, it's like we all have our own private rooms. We can guess what the other is thinking or how they'd react, but we can never fully be sure.”

The quiet crept back into the Vegas based apartment. RIA could feel her cheeks burning. This conversation was taxing for her. Would Angel leave now? Would she push her away? RIA couldn't handle that. Not after Sid. Not after Anna’s biting words. A moment later, she felt Quinley’s hands cup her cheeks, raising her face to meet her own.

"Thanks for telling me off the jump. Not keeping it secret. We could've gone months and you could've hid that. But you didn't. You trusted yourself. You trusted me.” The smkle across her face was effervescent. “Look, babe…what you are…it’s all pieces and parts of you. Who you are. What you are. And they're all born and founded from places and experiences central to the you. The whole you.” Angel gently said. “But the big thing is… regardless… I'm here to support you. And the other big thing is… we're going to ensure all those pieces inside your brain meat realize that it's hot bitch century and our ethos is about loving ourselves no matter how imperfect we are or feel. And if you feel something is going to help you bring that carnage out when you got to deal with carnage? Well fuuuuck yeah. Let's ride into fuckin WAR!”

The Psychoberry could feel her eyes start to water. Her grip around the younger woman's waist tightened while a weak smile worked its way across her trembling lips.

“How the hell did I get lucky enough to find you?” RIA whimpered softly before craning her head forward, lovingly pressing her lips against Angel’s. The kiss idled for a breath before the two broke off ever so slightly.

“Because… in this fucked up world… maybe some good things are just meant to be.” Angel cooed, reaching a caring hand over to wipe away a tear trying to escape down RIA’s reddened cheek. “Now… you. You and your big ole dumper. Bed. NOW! Before we lose our fingies and toesies!”

The unsure grin on the Psychoberry’s mug strengthened. She gave Quinley a playful nod.

“Yes ma'am!”

The Evening of ReVival 59

She stood in the bathroom of the cushy hotel room she had opted for instead of her usual surroundings. Spacious, light in color tone and tastefully decorated. But her? She was dark, a human black hole from which no light could escape. Black hair tinted with grayish purple highlights. Lips in a constant scowl, shining in an onyx shade. Her eyes, a void only broken up by an iris close in color to her highlights. The reborn Ria Nightshade was free.

She glanced down at her hands, clenching her fingers tight before releasing them. While doing so, RIA faded into view in the background of the mirror, as Nightshade had days ago.

“Well? How does it feel?” The Rainbow Riot inquired tentatively.

“Fine.” Nightshade grunted. “Feel even better when I have my hands around that piece of shit’s throat.”

You can't have a Ria party without the inclusion of Ria Lockhart, who appeared to the left while the two others talked.

“Look, can you do us a favor and not get yourself disqualified?” Lockhart snarked. “I'm all for you beating his ass. Thing is Rainbow’s put in a lot of work to get us where we are and she's put a lot of faith in YOU to keep your word. Faith that you, quite frankly, don't deserve.”

Nightshade glanced up at the mirror, dark eyes of menace making her feelings towards Lockhart’s words obvious.

“Unlike you two bitches, I don't lie to myself.” The Toxic Queen shot back. “I made a deal. I'll stick to it. As for not getting disqualified… We'll see.”

Lockhart rolled her eyes, but refrained from further pointless debate. Her line of sight shifted over to RIA. Her colorful counterpart had mostly been staring at the floor, her eyes having locked onto Nightshade only during her initial question. Her shoulders were sagging. A dog who'd had it's bone taken away, despite good behavior; that's what Lockhart saw.

“Hey.” She called out. The Psychoberry, prior distraction evident, snapped her attention towards the alpha.

“Hm? What's up?” RIA did her best to put a casual air to her tone.

“What's going on?” The Steel Hart interrogated, doing her best to try and take some edge off the question. “You look miserable. Did you really want Kael that badly?”

A mess of light pink and baby blue hair swished left and right.

“Not really… Like, I would've been happy to smack the shit outta that dickhead. I'm… I'm just worried.”

Nightshade, while not involved in the conversation, was definitely listening. An annoyed scoff came from her person.

“About what?” She snarled. “I told you, your little girlfriend isn't any concern of mine. I have one goal; Send Kael back to his fucking lab! That's it.”

“What about Seán?” RIA asked. Seán O'Neill. The two had been working closely together in PRIME for a bit now. In doing so, a friendship had formed between the two. “He's probably gonna be lookin' for me.”

Nightshade placed her palms flat on the roomy sink counter in front of the mirror, leaning forward just a bit. Her eyes focused on the Psychoberry's form in the reflective surface.

“Then let him find us. What the fuck do I care?” The Toxic Queen snorted.

“I care!” RIA answered, the volume of her voice rising. “He's my friend and I don't want ya to treat him like crap!”

Nightshade turned around. She leaned against the counter, arms crossed on her chest as she looked out into the rest of the bathroom. A generously sized soaker tub was situated in one corner, a shower with a rainfall head, glass doors and exquisite tiling sat opposite. Neither of the other two personalities were present in the space, their forms confined to only the mirror.

“He's not my concern.” The words slid out of Nightshade’s mouth, practically frozen over with how cold the delivery was. “He knows I'm around. If he's smart, he leaves me alone and lets me do my business. If not–”

“Shut up!” The Psychoberry cut her black clad parallel off. “He's been nothin' but supportive! He doesn't deserve your scorn!”

A cruel cackle wobbled out into the air from Nightshade.

“He's human. Of course he does.” The Toxic Queen countered. “But fine. As long as he doesn't try to lecture me, or do that buddy-buddy bullshit he pulls with you, he'll be safe.”

“Hey.” Lockhart interjected. “We gotta go.”

Nightshade nodded, pushing herself forward off the countertop. She grabbed her bag, haphazardly slinging it over her shoulder. She strode to the room’s door, taking hold of the handle.

“Time for me to chop some fucking Kael.”

~👿~

Max Kael. Wilhelm Kael. John Jacob Jingleheimer Kael. I don't really give a fuck what you call yourself heading into this match. Though I must admit a certain perverse pleasure over the fact that, despite your previous lofty attitude, you're not that different from us. At least, as far as mental illness goes. But let me be clear; You and I might be similar, but we aren't the same.

We're both monsters. Derelicts to humanity. But you? You're a bully. I get it. Most of these spongy little shits are weak. They're easy to take from. Your problem is the one you've had for awhile now… You're a coward. Oh yes. You'll bare your fangs, snarl and try to intimidate. Then a monster with bigger fangs, a scarier growl and an actual thirst for blood shows up and you'll scuttle off like the bitch we both know you are!

Look, I'm well aware you have a high pain tolerance. But pain is different between the two of us. I think you might fear it. So you try to dish it out in copious amounts in the hope you don't feel any yourself. Me? I don't like pain. I don't. It pisses me off. Another difference. Your fuel is fear. Mine is anger. If you had to place a bet on what would win between fear and anger, what would you choose? Because I'd put my money on anger every time.

Make no mistake, I have plenty stored up for you. I don't like the Rainbow bitch, but I have an obligation to her. You fuck with us, you deal with me. You try to hurt us, be it physically, mentally or emotionally, I try to hurt you. I want you to suffer! I want the word Nightshade to cause a shiver down your spine, a weakness in your knees and the evacuation of your bowels after I'm done with you! Now that Strawberry Shortcake and I have an understanding, I'll be doing everything I can to make that want reality.

You don't realize it yet, just how badly you've fucked up here. You aren't facing a woman. You aren't facing a human. I am a demon. Fury given flesh! Laugh if you want at that statement. Get it all out now. Maybe I can do the world a favor and break your fucking jaw so you'll have to shut the hell up for awhile! I'll certainly do my best to make that happen. Who knows, you might even take another dive like the mentally fragile little fuck you truly are.

I should apologize to the Glue Bitches right now. FLAMBERGE, Farthington, I'm sorry. Both you boys will be getting damaged goods. The Kael was already rotten anyway. But now, it's set to be shredded, burned and honestly? I'll probably piss on the ashes, though such treatment is too good for this miserable fuck. Coming from me of all people, that's a damning statement.

I guess we'll see just who is more depraved here, who's more willing to suffer to cause such in return. Fair warning, that's pretty much my thing. I'll see you at ReVival, you piece of shit!Do yourself a favor and make sure you don't take any blood thinners beforehand.

On second thought, go ahead and choke down a handful.