A More Clever Title For This Piece Has Fallen Into The River In PRIME City

01.18.26 Los Angeles International Airport Los Angeles, California

The Red Army may seem like a reunited family coming out of ReVival 80, but their travel arrangements coming out of San Juan gives a slightly different story. Notably absent from our sight is Alexei Ruslan as the Masters of the Moscowverse walk alone in leaving the main structure of the airport. Theirs is a journey taken the long way ‘round, as Kenny and Randall are greeted by the arrival of Kent Ramsey in his Chevy Camero.

“Fellas!” shouts the roving reporter with a wave. “It’s so good to see ya again, hop on in.”

The duo give a nod before entering the vehicle, with Ramsey having a laugh to himself as he pulls away to enter the mass of traffic making an exit from the facility.

“Well, ain’t this grand?” he asks, garnering zero response from the Masters before continuing. “The three amigos off on a road trip through Mexico! Nothing like it to clear your mind after…”

His voice trails off as he realizes where that sentence was heading, but his passengers aren’t foolish enough to ignore it.

“Yeah, we know,” Kenny says flatly with a sigh. “Not exactly the best night for us.”

“Dawkins fella is a bit of a dick, huh?” asks Kent. “I mean, you two stuck your necks out for him the moment he joined that Red Army, and how does he repay you? He calls you willing meat shields.”

Freeman and Schwartz look at each other, slowly realizing that their new friend is onto something as they nod in agreement. The car finally makes its way to the first exit bringing the trio out on the open road as Randall chimes in.

“You got that right, bud,” Randall says, feeling a sudden pep in his demeanor. “Talked all that smack and got the hell outta Dodge just so he didn’t face the consequences of his actions. I tell ya, if me or Kenny said even half of the shit Bryan did we’d have taken our licks for it, ain’t that right Kenny?”

Kenny takes the briefest of pauses before nodding in agreement.

“So ya know what? Screw him,” Randall continues. “I’m sure we’ll get a chance to deal with him soon enough. He doesn’t know it yet, but he’s gonna feel my wrath sooner or later!”

With that slightly ominous statement lingering, the car zooms down to begin the road trip ahead.

Comrade Freeman,

We write to you as the first update on our excursion to the Sparrow Hills, dispatched by Agent Ruslan in a search and rescue function. This message comes to you shortly after we’ve approached the base, preparing for the journey ahead.

The weather forecast looks favorable for the trek, which means we not only have a chance to ascend without hassle but have good visibility to keep a look out.

We will keep you informed on further updates as soon as possible. We look to honor the wishes of Starshy Praporshchik by helping you find your brother. Stay motivated, comrade!

~ Expedition Team 607

(Translated via Floogle Rubicon)

01.31.26 Monterrey, Mexico

The morning after has a certain effect on people, an effect that varies wildly depending on what happened the night before. For the Masters of the Moscowverse, that effect has them feeling surprisingly accomplished as they depart the lodging provided to them. The pair have a certain spring in their step, something that comes from playing a vital role in taking care of Red Army business. They remain silent as they step into the Camaro, something that Kent Ramsey picks up on as he pulls out of the parking lot.

“So, busy night?” Kent asks, oblivious to the goings on from ReVival 81 for reasons that shall remain a mystery to us. Kenny and Randall look to each other before replying with nothing more than a knowing nod. The reporter decides not to take up his calling to investigate, leaving the lack of response alone as they make their way toward the main highway.

It is only here, as they’re about to embark on the next leg of their Great Mexiverse Journey, that Randall finally chimes in to quip about the moment they had.

“We only went and kicked Bryan Dawkins’s ass,” Randall says with a hearty laugh, slapping Kenny on the back. “Ain’t that right, bud? Nearly put that man outta this business for good, like we did the Atomic Punks!”

“And the Masters Bounceback Tour doesn’t stop there,” Kenny says with a nod. “We’re off to Tijuana to take on Danny Christie and Big John Pepper. Gonna show them who’s--”

“Wait,” Kent interjects. “Big John Pepper, you say?”

“Yeah, what of it?”

Kent shakes his head, giving the sort of response that would be best vocalized with a “tut tut” before he offers some clarification.

“Dawg, I heard about that Big John Pepper. There’s an old tale goin’ round that he--”

“Dragged his ass across the ocean floor and created the Marinara trench?” asks Randall.

“Yeah! How’d you hear about that?”

“Someone was going on about that all night,” Randall explains. “But I gotta tell ya, if that’s true then someone’s gonna bring the mozz sticks to the fight. Why not the Masters of the--why are you staring at me like that?”

Randall stops at the sight of a glare from his tag partner, who just rolls his eyes.

“Legends aside,” Kenny says, ignoring the clueless look on The Entertainer’s face. “A man standing six foot ten and weighing well over three hundred pounds is someone we gotta chop down to size. Danny Christie ain’t a slouch either, I can’t ignore the man’s 2-2 record or his acumen for brawling. There’s a gameplan to be had there, and…what is it now, Randall?”

“Heh,” his friend simply adds. “Tutu.”